Why do romantic partners of narcissists get gas-lighted and abused sometimes for decades without knowing what's going on?
Why do ordinary people turn into Flying Monkeys and support the abuser?
Why judges, lawyers, even psychologists don't see the true face of the abuser and many times enable the abuse and punish the victim?
Why masses of people vote for narcissists?
Why masses of people are willing to go into a war and even die for narcissists?
In order to answer these questions, and answer them effectively so they can be addressed, we have to rethink how we know the world, how we know ourselves, and how we know people.
There is one particular weakness, only one, that the Narcissistic Paradigm exploits that enables it to accomplish its abuse (and its mission) from individual to global levels, and go undetected.
However, this one thing is very hard to explain, as it is rejected, and the rejection of it itself IS the very weakness that we are talking about.
We all live within a Paradigm. And paradigm is external. It is not us, it does not define us but we act it out. The Paradigm controls us. We experience Paradigm Blindness and that is why we do not see it. We are the HOSTS of the paradigm. And the paradigm controls our logic and consciousness. That is why we logically justify all our actions. Intelligence has no power against the paradigm, as the paradigm will seize it and the logic will build a massive defense mechanism to support and defend the paradigm. We understand that this runs significantly against modern psychology and thinking. Yet we MUST rethink this.
The paradigm (if malevolent) has no problem killing its host (suicide). The paradigm (if immensely in need to hide from its own host) has no problem to incapacitate its host by inducing chronic depression, anxiety, addiction, etc... Such a host will never see its paradigm, even to the detriment of the paradigm's mission itself. Better hidden and do nothing than exposed and do its mission.
The one thing that the Narcissistic Paradigm exploits to its advantage is Paradigm Blindness of ALL other paradigms. Let us explain.
Within Paradigm Blindness, the hosts (people) will judge other people: "Alcoholic SHOULD stop drinking." "Depressed SHOULD start looking at the bright side of their lives." "Unsuccessful and poor created their misery themselves." "Victim of abuse SHOULD have known better." "Judges SHOULD be educated so they can see abuse." etc. etc. etc.
And because we blame the host and not the paradigm, the host who has no clue that it is under control of its own paradigm, the host who uses its logic to justify its paradigm, we allow the paradigm to continue its mission.
The paradigms create a psychosis in their own hosts. The host (regardless of the paradigm - even flexible and benevolent ones) will see the entire world (and self) through its own paradigm. Through its own psychosis. The level of distortion of the reality (the psychosis) depends on the paradigm. Narcissistic Paradigm and Codependent Paradigm create a massive psychosis in their hosts.
People don't choose to be alcoholics, they don't choose to be depressed, they don't choose to kill themselves, they don't choose to be narcissists, and they don't choose to be codependent. That's all paradigm that was passed onto them (by the same paradigm hosted by child's parent(s)). Or caretakers, or the environment the child grew up in early stages of its life.
Yet because we blame the hosts within our own Paradigm Blindness, the paradigm itself can keep on its mission, not caring about what happens to its host.
This is going to be the hardest thing to accept by victims of abuse: Narcissistic Paradigm creates a psychosis in its own host (narcissist) and this host gets all the blame and attacks for the abuse. And because the blame is misdirected onto the host, the paradigm can continue its mission. Narcissists are people who are psychotic within their own Narcissistic Paradigm. The Narcissistic Paradigm can hypnotize them (just like it hypnotizes other people: Flying Monkeys - Psychosis). And all other paradigms (and their hosts), within their own psychosis, will blame and judge the hosts and not the paradigms. And THIS and ONLY THIS is what Narcissistic Paradigm exploits, which then enables its mission, of which the abuse is a symptom.
This is NOT to say that narcissists are not responsible and accountable for what they act out - the abuse they do. They are. But not more and not less than every single person on this planet that acts out its own paradigm.
And why is the above 'the hardest thing to accept by victims of abuse'? Because victims of abuse (mostly hosts of Codependent Paradigm) have a need to blame and project all the suffering onto the narcissist. This allows them to stay within their own Paradigm Blindness which will, ironically, enable the Narcissistic Paradigm to continue the abuse. The narcissists and the codependents have the 'same bug', if you will, that pins them against each other so the 'bug' can continue its mission. The Narcissistic Paradigm and the Codependent Paradigm have the same root and are massively complementary. They need each other.
The most powerful weapon that the Narcissistic Paradigm has at its own disposal is induced psychosis. First, it hypnotizes its host (the narcissist) that then acts out the paradigm. The narcissist is under such a powerful psychosis, it has no chance at life, no chance at free will. It is a dead man walking. A zombie. Narcissist embodies the paradigm. It has no way of escaping it. Its paradigm then hypnotizes its romantic partner, who questions reality, accepts the abuse and psychotically justifies it and denies it. Then it hypnotizes ordinary people who become Flying Monkeys, believing they are supporting a good cause, while under psychosis perpetuating abuse and become a feed of the narcissistic supply to the paradigm.
This can happen on an individual level but also on massive scales. Politicians under the spell of the Narcissistic Paradigm will attempt to induce massive psychosis. That's how they get voted in. That's also how global wars happen. How soldiers start fighting, how people start supporting wars. All under the pretense of 'righteous cause', pretense of 'fighting enemy' and all under massive psychosis. The paradigm does not care about killing people. Even its own hosts. Because it has its own mission and hosts are mere tools.
The most powerful weapon against the Narcissistic Paradigm that all other Paradigms possess is FREE WILL. More on that later.
So to summarize, the Narcissistic Paradigm has a powerful weapon of inducing psychosis in ANY paradigm whose HOST is a Warrior within a Paradigm Blindness. Paradigm Blindness IS what makes other hosts susceptible to the psychosis.
Narcissistic politicians NEED people who are blind so the paradigm can induce psychosis in them and that's how they get voted in.
Let's express it again as this is the most important thing to understand (and fight within one's own Paradigm Blindness): Narcissistic Paradigm exploits Paradigm Blindness of all HOSTS, regardless of their actual paradigms by inducing psychosis. Then the HOSTS will follow the Narcissistic Paradigm.
All paradigms have a need to stay hidden. That is true even for the reader her/himself. The reader's paradigm is no exception in hiding and fighting to see this and thus to accept this article.
Yet within this frame, hopefully the reader can understand that HOSTS who, on the surface, are on opposite sides of a fight (whatever the fight is) are actually operating within the same paradigm whose motive is something completely different. The fight itself IS what enables exactly what the paradigm wants. In other words, while the hosts are fighting, the paradigm gets what it wants from both hosts and the fight enables it.
Article When Fighting Abuse Actually Enables Abuse explains this again.
Redemption
The ONLY WAY to push back against the Narcissistic Paradigm is to STOP fighting the narcissists and start fighting the paradigm. Because if we fight the narcissist and not the paradigm, the abuse continues (all the way to global wars). And how do we fight the paradigm? We MUST start fighting our own paradigms by rising in the level against Paradigm Blindness. That's the most painful thing to do. That's why we avoid it, project onto others what we don't want to see, and become ignorant. And THAT is what the Narcissistic Paradigm exploits. Raising our awareness of our own Paradigm and thus fighting our own Paradigm Blindness makes us more resistant to the psychosis.
We have a FREE WILL. FREE WILL to fight our own Paradigm. Our own Paradigm Blindness. If we don't, if we choose to fight what our paradigm believes is our 'enemy', if we choose to use our logic to fight, logic that is a tool of our own paradigm, we will get fooled by our own Paradigm's psychosis and we will enable and support the very thing we so righteously believe we are fighting against.
It is Solzhenitsyn who expressed in Gulag Archipelago that "To do evil a human being must first of all believe that what he's doing is good". When in Paradigm Blindness, when under psychosis, ANY EVIL can be twisted into GOOD.
We MUST HEAL to fight our common enemy.